
Originally Posted by
bloodmuffins
I feel this so much.
I have social anxiety disorder and overall high levels of anxiety in general. The general anxiety has gotten to a level where I feel it interferes with my life and causes me some distress, so I think it could be diagnosed as something. I'm just not sure what exactly. You'd think generalized anxiety disorder, but I feel that my symptoms don't match up with it all the way. So I don't know. I just know that I have way more anxiety than I should have and it totally sucks.
I too suffer from Social Anxiety (diagnosed General Anxiety disorder) which is crippling to any future personal growth. I find that it only manages to anger me and take a blow at my pride and selfesteem because I can’t get over this problem only causing more anxiety and the cycle repeats itself.
I also have depression, but it’s getting better with time, though I have been dangerously close to a relapse in December.

Originally Posted by
bloodmuffins
I've also highly suspected that I have borderline personality disorder for the last five-ish years. At the very least I have borderline symptoms, if not the full-blown disorder. I've never seen anyone about it though. Again, related to social anxiety, I have huge fears of approaching a therapist and saying, Hey, I think I have this thing because I experience X Y and Z. What if they tell me I'm wrong? What if they think I'm stupid? Not to mention, I feel like BPD is seen as a "bad guy" disorder. People with BPD tend to act out and be difficult to deal with. I've seen so many books at Barnes and Noble aimed at helping significant others of people with BPD deal with having someone like that in their lives, but very few actually directed toward the BPD person themselves. I don't want to be seen as a bad person =\
Are you sure we’re not related because that is very similar to how I feel. I have already have so many ignorant people around me see me as a monster for my past actions over the summer, and I don’t want that to be what they think of me when they hear my name….
Isn’t it funny when you fight back injustice that you are called a monster for how cruel they’ve shaped you…
But I was pushed to a point and it only takes one push to make me fall off the edge.
It’s come to the point where my own behavior disturbs me… it’s getting out of control…and sometimes I feel my sanity slipping with the stress... as if my own personal demons are back to bite me, fighting for control. I know form reading this this makes no sense to you guys, but it is the best way I can explain it….
I was treated for this with Prozac once… when I was hospitalized but it wasn’t for that… (My deviantart journals *user name Ghouletic* explains why) it only seemed to make sleep impossible and turned me into the T-1000 terminator. No emotion, just a machine.
Going there lost my faith in that kind of help….it makes you feel less than human. So I figured, the only way to live is to find my own guidance. The one thing I do have to say is that going there changed my outlook on life.
"See my shadow changing, Stretching up and over me,Soften this old armor, Hoping I can clear the way,By stepping through my shadow, Coming out the other side, Step into the shadow, Forty six and two are just ahead of me.”
-46 & 2 by Tool